Music is a wonderful thing that can make one forget about everything. Some days I feel like the days are too long, the minute feels like an hour because of where my world is going. I want to fill it with music so I can forget for a while.
What do you do when your mind is filled with so much but can’t do anything about it? Can anyone answer please. The anxiety, the pressure of knowing that what’s in me is great, knowing that if I can just sum up the courage I can do wonders. At the same time it’s scary coz if I fail it’s not just me but my family. Anyway no wonder settling down is even much scarier since after that kids come.
I don’t want to be responsible for a whole human being that if I mess up their whole world crumbles. I don’t want to have the pressure to be perfect, of course I want to be loved. But love comes in different forms. To tell you the truth I don’t know what I’m really writing about. Whether it’s about love, filling time with music or just straight up my cowardliness on life. Anyway, if you think you’re not a coward good for you, but I know for sure that I am and in some way I don’t wanna change some part of it.
I know you’re wondering what I’m rambling about. It’s probably because not many people will read this and the few that will won’t finish reading the whole post. I love that I can write my feeling freely like this without promoting and knowing not many people will see. It’s like a sexual fantasy that people have to do something in public, the excitement and hoping no one is seeing you at the same time the thrill of what if I get caught. Anyway can’t really know much about that.
What was I taking about? Oh yea, so how do you make your days shorter. I’ve had this day mostly with music in my ears. Mostly listened to camila cabello, Demi lovato, Meghan trainor, elevation worship, and more. Hey now you know my kind of music I like.
I am going to stop here cause I don’t know what else to say. I should say I don’t know how to put it here anymore but when I get more writing power I will be back. I’m publishing this cause if I don’t I won’t punish anymore.